Last week another ministry leader announced their sudden departure from ministry, leaving many people saddened, shocked, and disappointed.
It’s not who you think it is. It’s not someone you know. It’s not someone I know.
But every week, more and more ministers are flaming out from overwork, moral failings, financial stress, impossible expectations, and more.
The ones whose names you know are only the tip of the iceberg.
As you read this article, a minister is packing up their family’s belongings to move from the place they’ve called home for years. The family can’t imagine what their future will look like.
Too Many Have Flamed Out
Unfortunately, that minister wasn’t the only one to have such a story last Sunday. Hundreds did. This year, thousands will leave the ministry, burned out and hurting.
Some have left as a result of their sin, leaving victims in their wake. But many more are gone because the burden of unrealistic expectations has left the exhausted pastor as the primary victim.
We hear about the famous pastors when they step down or burn out. That’s the price of fame, and it’s a steep one. Both your successes and your failures are amplified.
But a different price is paid by those who aren’t known to anyone outside their family and small congregation. Instead of the spotlight, the successes and pains of the small church pastors are ignored and forgotten.
Both scenarios are toxic. They break the heart of Jesus, damage his church, devastate pastors’ families, ruin ministries, and make it harder for church members to trust a pastor again—or to trust God again.
Change the Church Success Paradigm
It doesn’t have to be this way. It shouldn’t be this way.
We have to let go of the unbiblical expectations that have been placed on pastors’ shoulders. That we’ve placed on our own shoulders.
Pastors were never meant to carry this big a burden. No one person is capable of being the preacher, teacher, vision-caster, CEO, leader, evangelist, soul-winner, fundraiser, marriage counselor, and all-around paragon of virtue that we expect pastors to pull off—many of them while working a full-time job outside the church walls.
But it’s been done this way for so many years, it sometimes feels like a runaway train that can’t be stopped.
It must be stopped.
Redefining Success In Ministry
No one can stop this runaway train but us, pastors.
We have to say no.
For some of us, that means saying no to the unreasonable expectations of our church members, deacon boards and denominational officials. But for all of us it means saying no to our own unbiblical expectations of ourselves. Saying no to a paradigm that we have built and perpetuated around a combination of our own egos and insecurities.
We are not the builders of the church, Jesus is.
We are not capable of working ourselves to the bone emotionally and spiritually without something breaking inside us.
We can’t keep pushing ourselves physically with too little sleep, too much food, and too little exercise.
We can’t keep neglecting our spouses and families while we burn the ministry candle at both ends and not expect that everyone—our families, our churches, our victims, and ourselves—will pay an enormous price for it.
We have to redefine what success in ministry looks like. Because too many good people are being hurt as we pursue our current, unsupportable version of success.
Pray for Each Other
Today, let’s pause, take a breath, and pray.
- Pray for the hurting pastors, known and unknown, who have left a church they loved—and maybe still love.
- Pray for the famous pastors suffering under the unbearable glare of the spotlight.
- Pray for the unknown pastors feeling lost and forgotten.
- Pray for their families who have borne years of pain silently, and who are bearing even more right now.
- Pray for the church members who don’t know whether to feel angry, sad or something else.
- Pray for those who have been victimized in those situations where the failure has been sinful and predatory.
Pray that God, who promised that his yoke was easy and his burden light, will replace our self-imposed burdens with his peace, his comfort, and his hope.
(Photo by Ciphr | Flickr)
