If I was asked to use one word to describe the way a lot of small-church pastors feel about themselves when they compare their church to others, the word “failure” would be high on the list. (Other words include “discouraged,” and “frustrated.” But thankfully, “fulfilled” and “grateful” would be in the mix, as well.)
This is the first of four guest articles from pastor Kurt Lammi about what the Bible says about the feelings of failure in pastoral ministry.
— Karl Vaters
No one likes to fail.
We learned very early in our lives that failure is not a good thing. If we got an F in school, we were criticized, reprimanded, and punished.
An F didn’t feel like a reflection on a poor assignment, but on us as a student and a person. As we got older, we knew the hurt when no one “liked” something we posted online. We experienced the pain of being rejected on the dating scene. We understood the pain of not finding a job right away – or of being fired from a job.
We felt like an unpopular, undatable, unworthy failure.
Success And Failure In The World
In our world, failure is seen as the opposite of success – and success is measured in big numbers.
Some companies and corporate leaders do a good job reframing low numbers by talking about how they learned from their failures. In fact, in San Francisco, there is a Museum of Failure. It showcases many famous examples of failed products. It has everything from New Coke to the Sony Betamax, and more.
These exhibits are meant to inspire people to learn from their failures and keep going. However, that is often much easier said than done.
The Small Church Is Seen As A Failure
When it comes to the life of the church, the megachurch down the road is seen as successful by the world’s standards. It has lots of people, lots of money, lots of activities, lots of space in the building, and lots of things online.
Even though small churches often try their best, sometimes it’s easy to still become jealous of what the megachurch has.
Sometimes, though, we tell ourselves that success isn’t about big numbers. It’s about faithfulness. We like to encourage ourselves by criticizing the megachurch’s ministry. However, in a world that seems to operate on business models and earnings reports, it’s still hard not to feel like a failure sometimes in a small church.
(How many small church pastors dread the questions, “How many people were at worship last Sunday?” or “How much money was in the offering plate?” because we feel like we’ll be judged as a failure if we say low numbers?)
Jesus And Failure
When we think about failure, it’s helpful to look at the life of Jesus.
Jesus turned the world’s model of success on its head. When he was looking for disciples, he called fishermen and tax collectors, not the big, powerful, and important influencers of his day.
In his Sermon on the Mount, Jesus said that those who were seen to be failures are still blessed by God. When Jesus died, he looked like the ultimate failure.
The expectation of a successful Messiah was that he would be a King David 2.0. He would be the epitome of strength and power. He would be a military leader who would kick out the Romans and make life better for God’s people.
Even today, we still have this expectation about Jesus. Yes, we might not be living under the rule of the Roman Empire, but we still want Jesus to make our lives better.
We pray and say things like, “Dear Jesus, please help this sick person not be sick anymore. Dear Jesus, please help this relationship problem I’m having. Dear Jesus, please give wisdom and discernment to our leaders.” But then it seems like those things don’t happen. The sick person dies, the relationship problem gets worse, and the leaders still make poor choices.
It can seem like even Jesus is a failure for us today when our prayers aren’t answered the way we want.
God Redefines Failure And Success
However, we know about the empty tomb. We know about how God brings resurrection life.
We know about how the Messiah still changes the world in ways other than kicking out the Romans. We tell people about this all the time. We remind them of the promises of God who flips the world’s expectations around.
God continues to rewrite the story by redefining what failure and success look like.
God doesn’t care what our worldly definitions are for success and failure. For God, it’s not about big numbers and big followers and being a big influencer. It’s about love coming into a selfish world.
It’s about hope infusing those who are hopeless. It’s about Jesus conquering death. Success looks like the empty tomb.
This is good news. But sometimes we pastors don’t live out what we preach. More on that in Failure, Part 2: When Pastors Fail.
(Photo by Thomas Berg | Flickr)
