Pastoring can be a much lonelier calling than most people realize. When I started pastoring a small church after having been on staff at a large one, the adrenaline drop of going from a busy, noisy, staff-heavy church to being the only person in the building from Monday-Friday was a challenge.
Even if you don’t have a permanent church building, or you’re busily bivocational, or you don’t feel the need to sit alone in the building since everyone has 24/7 phone access to you, this guest article by Kurt Lammi resonates with the feelings of loneliness that many pastors often feel.
— Karl Vaters
There are days in the life of a small-church pastor that are very quiet. You are in your office by yourself. There are no other staff members there.
No one from the congregation stops by. The phone doesn’t ring once. The only lights on in the building are the ones in your office. Your car is the only one in the parking lot the entire day.
For some pastors, especially extroverted ones, being by yourself for an extended period of time can be very difficult. For other pastors, especially introverts, being by yourself for an extended period of time can feel like a welcome relief.
However, even when you are the only one in the building, you are still not alone.
In The Wilderness
There’s an old line about monks who used to spend time in the desert. “Be careful when going to meet God in the wilderness, because God is not the only one who lives out there.”
In other words, the devil lives out in the wilderness too. (Think about how Jesus’ temptation with the devil happened out in the wilderness, where no one else was around.)
When the pastor is at the church building alone, it’s not just a day without other people – it’s a time of heightened awareness of spiritual struggle.
God’s Reminders
Even when the pastor is the only one in the building, sometimes there is still plenty to do. There is a sermon to write. There is a lesson plan to prepare. There are books to read. And, of course, there are always prayers to pray.
But in that eerie quiet of the dark building, both God and the devil are calling you to listen to them. In that quiet, God is calling you to focus, to remember why you do what you do, to remember whose you are.
God is reminding you that, even when it seems like nothing is happening, God is still at work.
Maybe God is even reminding you that it’s okay to go slow sometimes. Not every day has to be packed full of “productivity” – because, quite often, we equate productivity with importance. If we’re “doing stuff,” then we are important.
But our importance comes from God, not our to-do list. (That doesn’t mean neglect your responsibilities. It simply means don’t find your identity in them.)
The Devil’s Lies And God’s Grip
While God is whispering these reminders and these promises to you, the devil is also speaking.
The devil is telling you to doubt yourself, to question if you are really making any difference, to wonder if anyone else actually cares about the life of the church other than you. The devil will try to distract you with random stuff on the internet, pulling you away from focusing on God.
Sometimes pastors don’t want to face these spiritual battles – or sometimes we are aware of them all too well. But even when the devil tries to distract you and pull you off course, remember that God has a tight grip on you. Find comfort and courage in the cross of Christ.
Remember that you are a beloved child of God and have received unique gifts to share God’s love with the people at that particular congregation.
Even when you are “alone” during the day, you are never alone.
Even when you struggle, God is still there. Even when the devil tries to confuse you and distract you, God is still holding on to you.
Thanks be to God for God’s constant presence, peace, and power – even when your car is the only one in the lot.
(Photo by Daquella manera | Flickr)
