Why an Unfriendly Small Church Is Worse than an Unfriendly Big Church

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Walking into a small church for the first time can be an act of great vulnerability. They know there won’t be anywhere to hide.

People come to a small church hoping for personal connection. They often want it so badly that they feel frightened and exposed by the mere fact of driving into the parking lot.

So when someone feels ignored in a big church, it’s pretty bad. But when someone feels ignored in a small church, it can be downright brutal, even scarring to their heart and their spirit.

An unfriendly small church can be a dangerous thing.

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3 thoughts on “Why an Unfriendly Small Church Is Worse than an Unfriendly Big Church”

  1. Totally agree, but there is also the other end of the spectrum, the “too friendly” church. I think of the scene in the Pixar movie Cars where they see-out-of-towners coming down the road and go into panic mode: “Customers! Customers!” Everyone in town basically smothers the newcomers. I’ve seen this in small churches, too. Any suggestions on how to keep balanced between friendly and too friendly?

    1. Small churches should have a few pre-selected members of the congregation who are responsible for new members and visitors. They should greet them, give them a church pamphlet and meet with them after the service during fellowship (if the church has it at this time). No they shouldn’t smother them, but they should be available if these new members or visitors have any questions or if they need anything. This, in my opinion is VITAL to a church if they are interested in attracting new members or keeping old ones for that matter.

    2. Great question. And yes, smothering is a concern. I think londongirl has the right idea – trained and assigned greeters are really important. Also, I’ll write a post soon on some other ideas for this.

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