How to Hang Out

How to Hang Out – Without Being a Jerk

Hanging out is holy. (You may know it as fellowship). And we want to keep it that way.

New Small Church should be helpful, fun and relaxed. Kinda like hanging out in the ideal church hallway after a great service.

But just like that hallway, it can be ruined by one obnoxious guest. You know the one. Every church has one. If your church doesn’t have one, some other poor church got stuck with two.

So that the 99.9% of us who know how to behave online can relax and enjoy hanging out, we have a few reasonable rules set up for that remaining 0.1% of people who just don’t know when enough is enough.

Stay on topic. We’re about Small Church ministry. Even more specifically, as our motto states, we’re about Encouraging, Connecting, Equipping, Innovation & Leadership. If you’re looking for that, or adding to that, hang out and enjoy.

We’re NOT about theological debates, politics, apologetics, whining or bashing.

There are plenty of websites where you can do all those things – or you can start one of your own. Just don’t do it here. Part of what New Small Church is about, is creating a place to get away from those distractions (yes, even theological debates can be a distraction – remember what Jesus said to the Pharisees?) and focus on things that help us all with hands-on ministry.

If you have challenges, struggle, joys, hopes, questions or experiences that relate to the subject at hand, please share them here.

We don’t always have to agree with each other. You don’t even have to agree with me. But I will insist that when we disagree we do so with an agreeable spirit.

This is not a place to sell your products, blog or ministry. I won’t do that on your site, so please don’t do it on mine. Any comments that are obvious ploys to link to what you’re selling, will be deleted.


I’m sure I’ll add a few more guidelines as time goes on, but for now, you get the idea.

The bottom line is that being online doesn’t give any of us a pass from behaving like brothers and sisters in Christ.

Hang out, share, read, relax and don’t let the 0.1% drag you down. I won’t.


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14 thoughts on “How to Hang Out”

    1. Hi Mark,

      Glad you want to connect. There are a couple ways. On the right-hand side of the website, no matter what page you’re on, there are two boxes. One where you can click to Follow on Twitter, another where you can click to Like us on Facebook.

      If you’re reading this on a mobile device, you may just have to scroll down to find it. The website is configured differently depending on what device you’re on.

      Or, to follow on Twitter just click here. To Like us on Facebook, click here.

      Also, in the next few months we’ll be adding a discussion board where people can ask questions, offer ideas and start discussion right here.


    2. I have been a Pastor for many years. I have a Masters and help small churches grow closer to the Lord first and stronger spiritually second. However, I have committed the unpardonable sin of a Pastor. My wife cheated on me (that doesn’t make me innocent) so I divorced and later on married again. However, churches will not touch me because of this. Do you know of a Christian Church or Non-Denominational Church that needs a Pastor and wants only to focus on growing stronger. You know…..put your hands to the plow and don’t look back – Jesus.

      1500 Pastors a month are quitting the ministry.
      70% constantly fight depression.
      40% have had an affair.
      70% read the Bible only when they are preparing a sermon.
      90% say they are lonely.

  1. Thank you for the book I received it yesterday and have just finished it today. I felt as if I was reading a autobiography of my life as a Pastor. WOW! This is what I have dealt with for the last 12 years, thank you my friend for setting me free from myself. Ive always wondered what am I doing wrong. Today I have realized Im not doing nothing wrong. As a matter of fact I believe Im doing it right. Ive been kicking the devil`s butt at my church now for 12 years and you know Ive got a lot more ahead. I am Pastor Mike Long and I am a small church Pastor and Im glad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thanks man your awesome. You know Im thinking how about some seminars and conferences for small church Pastors making their church GREAT!

    1. Mike, that makes me soooo happy! Keep kicking the devil’s butt!

      Where are you located? I’ve been talking to church leaders in several states and Canada about possible seminars next year. One of them might be near you.

  2. Hi Karl, I received a copy of your book from our District office, and had trouble getting to sleep after I started to read it, not because the content was scary, but because it was honest, funny, practical and compassionate. It made me excited to hear that someone else experienced similar circumstances and emotions related to this type of ministry.

    Thank you for being courageous in expressing your journey, and encouraging to all of us who have been, or continue to be in small-church ministry. I continue to “chew” on a lot of what you’ve shared, and find it liberating and life-giving. Thank you again!

  3. Karl, as you know I am knew to your blog, what a great place to share. Love love your guidelines above. Really sharing, when you are in a small church, sometimes you feel alone. You are fairly certain others are out there, but just connecting and knowing others are having similar experiences, the positive and challenges is great. God intended us to be in community and how great He uses the web and you to make that happen. Blessings abound

  4. Karl, thank you so much for writing “The Grasshopper Myth”. It was given to me about a year ago from our state youth director (I serve on the youth board). I just picked it up and starting reading it last week and it has changed my thinking on church. I had to admit to myself that I am a small church pastor and that everyone has their own definition of what a small church is (I have a friend who says they love their small church of 150). I used to try and think and work like a big church. That has changed! I am enjoying what God is doing in our small church of 40 or so. He has opened many doors just in the past week! Thank you again…God Bless!

  5. Hey Karl this is great encouragement. I’d like to literally connect – you know the old fashioned way – in person! Are there some congregations that have become good and healthy small churches you could recommend. I’m anticipating a sabbatical that will allow me time to travel and interact in person with leaders and congregations experiencing renewal. I’m in the mid-west, but could travel anywhere.

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